Everyone's Failure. My Success.

April 7, 2015

"So when are you going back to work?" A question I have started to dread when I hear it. When we first made the decision to keep me home with the boys I was ecstatic... truthfully I still am, but it seems not everyone is.

When did being a stay at home mom become looked at as more of a failure then a success? I remember my mother staying home and thinking how cool it was. Other children wanted to be me so their moms could stay home. Now it seems times have changed. People expect you to make a lot of money, have the newest of everything or obviously you can't be happy.

With a three year old, and a newborn we decided it was much more cost effective to keep me home. I am nursing, using cloth diapers and daycare is crazy priced. So we were happy to stay home. Until I started seeing the look on peoples faces when I quickly reply with " I'm not going back, I'm staying home with the boys."

Its as if I am saying something terrible. Its because people believe those that stay at home are lazy, stupid, or something along those lines. But that isn't true. I made all As in highschool and college, graduated with my associates degree because I didn't want another. I was bored with it. I made the decision to leave and didn't look back. I'd also like to mention, I work more now being at home than I ever did at work. At home I never have a "lunch" or "break". I am always on go, always have to be ready for action....ready to clean up any messes that the boys can make.

Do I believe everyone should stay at home? No. If you want a career and being a mommy you go girl! I know you will do great, but don't judge us that don't want that. I've seen the looks,heard the tone of your voice when you try to hold back your judgement but I know its there.  I've talked to others and they've had the same thing happened to them. We need to come together and realize that people like different flavors. Being at home with my children, watching them grow, and having supper cooked when my husband gets home may sound 1950s but I assure you its not and its what I want. I wouldn't give this up for anything!

Women should stop judging others on parenting styles, job or no job, size and many of the other things we judge. We should come together, help each other out, praise each other and give advice.  Live your path and let others live there's. Just remember what you may see as a failure, may be their greatest success.


  1. Children are only little once. Enjoy it- they grow fast and in no time you will no longer be "cool" to hang out with. Many children these days don't have anyone to raise them, they go to daycare, go home to eat, then bath and bed with little, to no, time with actually "bonding" time with the parents. I think you are doing a wonderful job as a mother and a wife. I am glad I stayed home and worked very little when my daughter was small. I would not go back and trade it for the world. Let people think what they want to think, long as you and your family is happy that is all that TRULY matters! GREAT JOB!

  2. Deanna, It's so ironic your last two posts are so similar to mine. If you haven't already, check out my post titled, My love-hate relationship with breastfeeding. I believe our babies are also close in age, my youngest is 3 months. So great to meet another Mom like me. You go girl!

  3. Oh awesome! I'll have to look it for sure! Yes my youngest will be 3 months tomorrow. My oldest will be four in may! I'm happy to meet you


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