The Big Picture

November 18, 2015

Here we are at the end of November of 2015. I can't believe how fast the time has already flown by. It seems like just yesterday I was planning my high school graduation and here I am now. Married. Two Kids.

I had a friend say to me; "If I could go back I would do things so differently, but who wouldn't?" This got me thinking.

Would I change having my first child at 20? My second at 24? Getting married at 23? Would I change all the heartbreaks that happened? Would I change the decision I made to not go away for college? Would I change it all if I could?

The honest answer... No. I wouldn't change a single thing. It took me a while to think about this, and I actually prayed over it. Why was something like this important to me? I think it's because at times it is so hard to see God's plan in our life. We are so caught up in the "we want it now" idea, that we can't be patient enough to see the big picture. God's picture.

There were many times I prayed to God after a teenage breakup, and begged him to find a way for me and my ex to get back together. Little did I know that the reason why I didn't get a "yes" to that prayer was because he had a much better man for me. Someone who would literally make me laugh till my side hurts, someone who just by hugging me can turn my day around. Someone that would love me as much as I loved them.

I wouldn't change having my kids  or getting married at a young age. I love that I am able bodied enough to see them grow. I love that when they get out of the house and go to college that I'll still be young enough to go do things again. I love the age I had them, and I guess to some it seems young. But I think it was just perfect.

You see when we are in the moment, we only think about ourselves. However, we aren't in control. The Lord is. When we decide to accept this and to let the Lord take control of our lives we start seeing how it is all apart of his plan.  Had anything in my life been different I wouldn't be here today. I wouldn't be the person I am. I wouldn't have the beautiful children that I have. Could I possibly have been single, learning to make a million dollars a year and traveling the world right now? Sure. But that wasn't the life God had planned for me and I'm great with that.

I left college because I couldn't decide what I wanted to study. It wasn't because I was not smart, on the contrary I had excellent scores. But nothing ever seemed right. It's because God called me to be a mother. A mother to boys. To raise them as gentlemen. To be God fearing. He gave me the most perfect job!

So in times of doubt, always remember that God loves you and is in complete control.

Jeremiah 29:11-13

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

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